The worries never stop, so I just keep knitting. This infinity scarf which I began months and months ago, I just ripped out because it kept curling up. Why? I didn't bother to knit and purl several rows at the beginning to keep it from doing that.
It seems to be indicative of my life right now. So many things I cannot control and when I think I should control them, I screw them up and makes things worse. Such is my life right now. It is very hard to figure out what to do and say.
I work a full time job that doesn't always keep my mind constantly busy so I have too much time worry. I wish I could pick up my knitting and let that calm me down. But sitting at my desk knitting in a job where knitting is not my job, is a little hard to excuse. I mean people get coffee and smoke breaks, I could call it my sanity break I guess?
Control...too much tension causes my knitting to be sweaty, tight and look stretched. Too little tension and it has holes, puckers and falls off the needles.
My life of how much control, how little control I have or can have causes my daily introspection. I cannot control all aspects of my life but I can control my reaction to things or events in my life. If I practice the middle of the road control, then my knitting as well as my life is easier, looks and feels more calm and gives me less stress. I can do this.
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